Relationships and social interactions are challenging for everyone to navigate, but they can seem even more complex when you have autism. Understanding relationships is a lot about pink and red flags. No, these are not real flags; they are adjectives for warning signs that allow you to assess the life expectancy of your relationship. So, let’s split these concepts into 3 obvious and easy-to-relate parts.
What Are Pink Flags?
Pink Flags are warning signs that something could be wrong in a relationship, without it being a dealbreaker. Pink flags are clues that call for more observation or conversation. They are not serious but registering.
So what about the pink flags?
Red Flag #1: Communication: If you are not clear and can’t have an open conversation with them, it might be a red flag. That is not to write off the relationship, but more communication may help.
The behaviour is not consistent: If the person says one thing but does another, be careful… that can be already a pink flag. It could signal that this person has some emotions they are having trouble sorting through or articulating. Are there moments when a friend or teammate says he is going to be somewhere, at this time, but never seems to queue in — ever thought it was becoming habitual? That could be a pink flag.
Conflicting Priorities: If you and another person have opposite priorities or values, it might be a pink flag. That is not to say you can’t have a successful relationship, but it is something that should be explored and explained.
What Are Red Flags?
Red flags are much stronger indicators that maybe there are some fundamental issues in the relationship. Frequently, they are red flags suggesting something is very off and, even worse, potentially dangerous to your health and happiness. Red flags typically require more immediate attention, and you will need to work through them or leave the relationship.
Some red flags include the following:
Someone Disrespecting You — If someone disrespects you in their words/actions/thoughts, files AT&T for example or invalidates your emotions then it is a red flag. We NEED to have RESPECT in our relationships, plain and simple.
Manipulation — If someone is trying to control you, this is a huge red flag. This may include: making you feel bad if you set boundaries or guilt-tripping you, pressuring you to do things that are uncomfortable for you.
Abuse — this should be a no-brainer, but physical, emotional or verbal abuse from someone is never okay. We need to recognize these symptoms and consult someone immediately if you face them.
Red & Pink Flags
Trust Yourself—If you feel that something needs to be done, trust yourself. Everybody Call — take a step back and look at the situation.
Talk Honestly: When you see a red flag address it by speaking with the person that brought the pink fact to life. Sharing experiences is sometimes all it takes to work out an issue before it starts to become a problem.
Ask for help: If you think something might be a red flag but you’re not sure, or if you don’t know what to do about one, do not hesitate to consult with friends, family members, or a counsellor.
This Could Mean that it is vital to impose boundaries in ALL relationships because outside of this, people feel out of control. The consistent crossing of such boundaries should be met with reconsidering the person in your life who does not respect them.
Your Mental & Emotional Health comes First — Make sure to prioritize your well-being If you are feeling worse off because of a relationship, it becomes very necessary for you to explore your options and keep yourself safe.
Conclusion
Pink and Red flags help you understand that these are important relationship indicators, they could make your decision more conscious before continuing. Recognizing these signs and responding to them accordingly will help you become more confident in your relationships, in the sense that they are working for you rather than pulling you back. Don’t forget that you have the right to take care of and prioritize your needs while at the same time building deep connections with others.
